Safety Communication Health Education Future
A place for families to explore what it means to be responsible

As a parent, we must take teach our children ‘money smarts’. Can you imagine how empowered you would be if your parents taught you how to balance a checkbook, invest in the stock market, manage credit card debt, start a business, or the power of compounding interest? If you were one of the lucky few whose parents did teach you money skills, consider yourself blessed. The present economic situation is a perfect time to teach our kids the importance of money management and the need to respect money for what it is, and isn’t.

So, where do we start? With the basics. Depending upon your child’s age, you can start with talking about money. Most of us don’t discuss the family’s financial situation at the dinner table. I propose you do. I think it’s important that children understand what is happening, good or bad, with the money being earned. Don’t get me wrong here; I’m not suggesting you tell your kids your annual income or the balance of your investment portfolio. What I am suggesting is to bring the kids into conversations regarding ways to save, creative ways to earn additional money and what to spend that money on. Involve them with decisions on vacations, donating to a charity or cause, or how they plan to buy their first car.

For middle schoolers and teens, open a savings account and teach them the importance of monthly deposits, regardless of the amount. Create in them the healthy habit of making that deposit every single month. Compounding interest and time are on their side and simple, small deposits made regularly add up to huge money later. Did you know that $4 a day, 5 days a week invested at 10% (historically, the average in the stock market) turns into $1.3 Million in 50 years. Tell that to your teen who loves to visit Starbucks or Jamba Juice!

Introduce the concept of a budget, although I don’t care for that word. (Like a diet, it implies I have to give up something). It is about compromise and being aware of where the money goes, so rather, suggest this: what is priority, given the income? Teach them to live within their means and the dangers of credit. If our kids can understand this now and realize the consequences if they don’t, it will make for a peaceful and prosperous future. As parents, we know there isn’t anything we want more in life than to see our children healthy, happy and at peace.

After receiving her Bachelors Degree in Accounting, Patti Handy, Money Coach spent nearly 25 years in banking, working in various capacities in the institutional investments arena. While working in banking, she obtained her Series 7 and 63 licenses, which she held for 10 years. Most recently, she has been a Sr. Mortgage Advisor for 7 years, presently holding a Real Estate Brokers license. As a CTA Certified Life Coach, Patti uses her unique combination of life and work experiences to help clients take control of their money matters, create a wealth plan, consolidate debt and improve credit scores. 

Inspired by wanting to teach her son money smarts, she has expanded her practice to include teens and young adults. Visit www.kidscashcoach.com to gain access to a FREE weekly video series entitled “The Money Minute”, designed specifically for teens. 

Looking for ways to teach your teen about money?  Sign up for Patti's amazing teleseminar Creating Wealthy Teens. at http://creatingwealthyteens.com/

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Sometimes when I walk into the children's section of a bookstore, my eyes glaze over and I am just plain overwhelmed by all of the colors and characters around me.  It is hard to know which books will really grab my child's attention and which books will be read once and passed over in the future.  I like books that we can read over and over again and that become like old friends, but with all of the books out there it is hard to know which are the gems and which are the duds. 

In order to remedy this situation, I keep an ongoing list of books that others have recommended or that I have otherwise heard about so that in those random moments when I pop into the book store I am prepared with my handy list!  (Thank god for iPhones, so I can find the thing!)

I have noticed that the books that are the most beloved are the ones that empower kids to be creative and have an imagination.  The other day, I found one!  And when I read this cute little book called Higher and Higher by Leslie Patricelli to my 3 year old, I could see the delight in her eyes and feel it in my belly.  These are the kinds of books that spark imagination and get kids (and adults) excited about life!  The thing I like about this book in particular is that it doesn't have a lot of words, but instead, a child's ride on the swing becomes rich with illustration and emotion.  Even my 10 year old enjoys reading this book to my 3 year old (and if a book can tear her away from Harry Potter, you know it is good)!  

The top three books on my list for 2-5 year olds:

1.  Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Borwn

2.  The Snowy Day by Ezra Jack Keats

3.  No David by David Shannon 

Start your book list today for your next trip to the book store and if you know a child between 2-5, make sure Higher and higher is on it.  Happy reading!   

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Right now, as we watch the stock market rise and fall and fall and fall and as pink slips litter desks across the country, money and knowing what to do with it becomes an important lesson that parents can and should teach their children about.  Children who learn about and understand money tend to develop a natural curiosity and interest in their own finances from an early age which can lead to a healthy financial future.  

You can start by explaining the value of each type of coin and how many coins one might need to buy a toy.  As your child begins to grasp how money works, you can explore such topics as how businesses are started, the importance of money management and how the stock market works.  Before your long, your child will be coming up with his or her own ideas about money and sharing ideas and questions with you.

But, you may be asking, how do we teach our kids about money if we aren't great at managing it ourselves?  How about finding someone else to teach your child (you may learn a thing or two that could help your own financial situation!).

If you are looking for a fantastic resource for any parent with a child age 12-18 who wants their child to learn about money I encourage you to stop by Kids Cash Coach .  Patti Handi, the Kids Cash Coach will help give your teen quick 1 minute money tips to get started.   The "Money Minute" feature is free and it will help your child start to think about how they can earn and save money.  If you would like to move beyond that, Patti has more products and services designed to get your teen thinking about green.

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Reggie Melrose PhD.  

Whether you are a parent or a teacher, there are 5 things you could be doing right now to help a child who has been shaken by a crisis, too much stress, or trauma. The goal is always to restore a greater sense of balance and ease in the child’s nervous system so he or she can be fully present to learn and behave adaptively.

1) Foster a compassionate RELATIONSHIP that communicates, “We will get through this together.”

2) Create relative SAFETY with consistent rules and regulations that are posted and/or reviewed with clear rewards and consequences that the child can come to predict. Safety comes from predictability.

3) Involve the child in COMMUNITY, a place where they feel they belong, where they matter and have chances to start over anew no matter what.

4) Provide the child with multiple opportunities to experience their own COMPETENCE. What they feel good at doesn’t matter, just that they feel good doing something, i.e. playing a game, making someone laugh, helping someone, making something from scratch, learning something new, teaching something to a younger child, getting a chance to show off a talent, skill, ability, athletic, artistic, or intellectual accomplishment.

5) Support SENSORY AWARENESS by talking to and engaging the child in noticing the sensations that are happening in his or her body, where they are tight, tense, relaxed, calm, shaky, or warm. The body is speaking to us to let us know when we need to take care of ourselves.

If you learn to do this for yourself first, you will be able to pass on to your child one of the most important resources of all (please read “Why Students Underachieve: What Educators and Parents Can Do about It” to learn why all of this is so important.)

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I don't know what it is about girls and horses, but I remember being a little girl and feeling a special bond with them.  They are gentle (for the most part) giants and they have beautiful coats, mains and tails.  The thought of brushing all of that hair just makes little girls go wild!  But, when you boil it down, horses have a special soothing energy and beauty that feels other-worldly at times and inspires little girls to dream.

Now, as I watch my own girls grow, their love of horses has emerged.  They love to draw them.  They love to pet them when we go to Idaho and walk along the country roads. And they love to play with and collect the Bella Sara Treasures trading cards!  These cards are great because they not only have the inspirational messages on the cards, but also printable activities including coloring pages, wallpapers, jigsaw puzzles and a poster.  My girls eat this stuff up!

On top of the cards, this March, Bella Sara has released the Bella Sara Miniatures Collection which includes the new soft minature horses that allow the girls to play with actual figurines of the horses they have collected in the cards. The figurines come with a stand that was a bit challenging to assemble, but once we did, they had a blast playing!  We had a little bit of drama over whose was prettier, but once we got past that they were very happy with their new little toys.

We are also really excited because from the beginning of March until the end of April, you can register for a chance to win a Treasure Hunt Party.  Once my girls heard about the chance of a party, they assembled a list of who they would invite to their Treasure Hunt Party and are eagerly waiting to find out if they have won. 

I am just really happy to see my daughters interact with each other without fighting!  I am also happy to see them developing interests of their own that allow them to work together and that inspire them to dream. 

What does your child dream about?  Is there something you can do to help your child have his or her own dreams?  Without dreams, we have nothing to strive for.  Be a role model by talking with your child about what your dreams were when you were a child and what they are now.  That should help get the ball rolling!    

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Sure, being a parent involves a healthy amount of stress, but what are we supposed to do with the revelation that we have innocently been giving toxins to our children for the majority of their lives?  Whether it is peanut butter, cold medicine, leaded toys, hormones in milk and meat, cleaning chemicals, carpet fibers, plastics, immunizations, and now high fructose corn syrup... how is a parent supposed to keep a child safe and healthy these days?

According to two new US reports, high levels of mercury abound in everyday foods that many American children eat.  Granted, there are always two sides to every story, but the fact remains that the FDA has supposedly known about the toxins in corn syrup and done nothing about it. 

In response to this, I can't help but wonder what is the point of having a Food and Drug Administration to protect us, if they are going to allow unsuspecting Americans to ingest toxins from popular brands such as Minute Maid, Coca-Cola, Hershey's, Quaker, Hunt's, Smucker's, Kraft, Nutri-Grain, and Yoplait?  

"Mercury is toxic in all its forms.  Given how much high fructose corn syrup is consumed by children, it could be a significant additional source of mercury never before considered. We are calling for immediate changes by industry and the FDA to help stop this avoidable mercury contamination of the food supply.” said IATP’s David Wallinga, M.D., and a co-author in both studies.

As I said, there are two sides to every story, so are you curious what the Corn Refiners Association had to say about these reports?  They maintain that these reports used outdated information and of course their corn products are "natural".  Do they take into account that high fructose corn syrup has played a major role in the obesity epidemic in the US?  Of course not.  

It is my opinion that as parents, we need to protect our children.  If you want to prevent your child from becoming a statistic for diabetes, cancer, obesity or anything else, it is critical that you are informed about the dangers that your children face and that you stay updated on current events. 

More importantly, it is essential that you make decisions to help keep your child safe, healthy and happy.  If you know that something your child is eating could be potentially hazardous to his or her health, you need to step in, explain the situation to your child and provide guidance to teach your child to take responsibility for his or her health in the future.

What actions can parents take with this new information of an incredibly toxic substance that is potentially contained in almost every staple of our children's diets?  Stop buying processed foods!  We know that our bodies cannot process these ingredients and that they can cause negative symptoms such as hyperactivity, restlessness, irritability and worse.

It is time that we take control of what goes into our bodies and our children's.  Grow a garden or buy organic produce and make sure your children get outside to play and be active.  Filter your water, choose organic or natural products and avoid refined anything.  If high fructose corn syrup has mercury in it, what is next?  Protect yourself and serve your family food that is grown from the earth.  We are heading into a time where it makes more sense to simplify than to live in convenience.  Personally, I would rather grow a garden than have my child undergo chelation treatments for mercury poisoning.  Wouldn't you?

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Have you ever felt that keeping the family activites in order is just out of control?  Soccer, play dates, after-school classes, tutors, school events, family dinners, school functions, work meetings, networking events...  where does it all end and how do you manage it all?

If you are a mom who is anything like me, you may be feeling a bit overwhelmed with the details of keeping the family organized!  Well, I have a little secret to share with you and it is called Quibb.  What?  Yes, Quibb.  This fantastic website will help any family stay totally organized and the beauty is that it is online and everyone in your family can have access to a public web page, a group calendar, a shared to-do list, automatic reminders (no more nagging needed, Quibb will do it for you!), photo sharing, file sharing, group emails and more.  

If you are a room parent, Quibb is a great way to get everyone on the same page and to manage tasks and priorities.  This website will help head off any problems with miscommunication or lost flyers because everything is online and available any tme.  The only question I have is, what took them so long?!  Sign me up!

Are you ready to SIMPLIFY your life?  Go to Quibb today if you want to stop feeling overwhelmed, so you can relax and enjoy your kids! 

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Every once in a while, we happen upon something that has the potential to make a gigantic improvement in someone's life.  Child abuse is one of those things that many adults have carried with them in silence since childhood.  Guilt, shame and negative feelings result from abuse.  No child should have to carry this burden.  But is there a  way to prevent the abuse in the first place? 

What if a book could help train kids to protect themselves against abuse, giving them the words and actions to take, right from the start?  What if something as simple as a book could empower kids who have been abused to seek help?  Jill Starishevsky has masterfully written "My Body Belongs to Me" for just this reason. This book is a gift to the world to help stop the abuse.

As a parent and child safety expert, I encourage all caregivers to purchase a copy of this powerful book and read it with the child in your care.  We can't be with our children every second of their lives, so we must teach them to speak for themselves and that abuse is something that should not be tolerated.  Please help spread the word about this important book, it could help a child who desperately needs it!  

Newly Released Children’s Book
“My Body Belongs to Me” Makes a Difficult Discussion Easier
Groundbreaking Title Teaches Children That Their Bodies Are Their Own


NEW YORK, NY--(January 26, 2009) - Safety Star Media announced today
the publication of its children’s book, “My Body Belongs to Me,”
written by New York City prosecutor of child abuse and sex crimes, Jill
Starishevsky (Hardcover $14.95 U.S., ISBN 9780982121603).
Using her decade of experience, Ms. Starishevsky, mother of two, has
crafted a book that speaks to children - it makes them aware that when
it comes to their bodies, there are boundaries. The book encourages
them to tell a parent or teacher if someone touches their “private parts.” Inspired by one of Starishevsky’s young sexual abuse victims who followed Oprah Winfrey’s
advice and outcried after watching an episode of her show, “My Body
Belongs to Me” is geared toward children ages three to ten. It tells
the story of a child who is inappropriately touched by an uncle’s
friend.

The clear message of “My Body Belongs to Me” is that
if someone inappropriately touches you, tell.  “Just as we carefully
teach youngsters what to do in case of fire, we must teach them what to
do if someone touches them,” urges Starishevsky. Surprisingly, until
now, there were no age-appropriate books available to help adults
discuss this subject with young children. “My Body Belongs to Me” fills
this void and facilitates this dialogue in a straightforward yet
sensitive manner.  Pattie Fitzgerald, founder of Safely Ever After,
a safety program for parents and kids, proclaims, “I have been teaching
child safety classes for nearly ten years, and this is the first
children’s book I’ve seen that really addresses the issues in a way
that kids can understand and that doesn’t seem scary or heavy-handed.”

“‘My Body Belongs to Me’ makes a difficult discussion easier.
Unfortunately, parents often avoid this conversation until it is too
late.  By saying nothing
to our children, we are sending them out there defenseless,” said
Starishevsky.  Parents and educators need to start taking measures to
protect children before they are hurt.  This book offers one of the
most important lessons we need to share with our children.  As licensed
family and child therapist Kimberley Clayton Blaine notes, “Prevention
is key when it comes to children’s personal safety.  Kudos to Ms.
Starishevsky for taking on this project.”

Ms. Starishevsky has dedicated her career to seeking
justice for victims of child abuse and sex crimes. Outside the
courtroom, her fondness for writing led her to create thepoemlady.com,
where she pens personalized pieces. Her mission to protect children,
along with her penchant for poetry, inspired “My Body Belongs to Me”.
Starishevsky is also founder of HowsMyNanny.com,
a service that enables parents to purchase a license plate for their
child’s stroller so the public can report positive or negative nanny
observations.  Ms. Starishevsky has appeared on Good Morning America, CNN International, Donny Deutsch’s The Big Idea and Fox News
National among other news programs.  Utilizing this platform, Ms.
Starishevsky hopes to globally spread awareness about child sexual
abuse prevention to ultimately stop the silence.
“My Body Belongs to Me” is available for online purchase through
www.MyBodyBelongstoMe.com

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"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."

                                                     -- Martin Luther King Jr.
 

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As many of you know, a few weeks ago John Travolta and Kelly Preston's 16-year old son, Jett tragically died as a result of a seizure.  Jett suffered from seizures for many years and was given medications to try to control the disorder, but ultimately the medication lost it's effectiveness and Jett passed away on January  2, 2009 while the family was vacationing in the Bahamas. 

Although most seizure disorders are genetic, anyone can suffer from a seizure at any time.  It is important for all caregivers to know what to do in the event of a seizure and when emergency services need to be called. 

Seizure Safety Tips:

• If your child suffers from a seizure disorder, talk with him or her about what happens when he has a seizure and how to stay safe.
• Talk to your child about auras and what symptoms she may experience before a seizure so that she can sit or lie down or get to a safe place in the event that a seizure does occur.
• Every child's seizures are different, so talk with your child's physician about caring for your child's symptoms.  In cases where children fall during a seizure, a helmet may help to protect your child's head.
• Children with a history of seizures should avoid climbing activities where they can fall.
• Make changes in your home that create a safe atmosphere for children with seizures, such as railings and gates on stairs and around beds, padded carpeting, handgrips and ramps, etc.
• Remove throw rugs, secure dangling or obstructive electrical cords, remove low tables or furniture that can be tripped over, eliminate sharp corners and glass tables, etc
• Children who suffer from seizures should not sleep on the top bunk of a bunk bed.  They beneft from low beds that have padded railings around them.
• Place guards around heat sources such as fireplaces, stoves, ovens and grills.
• Place your child on his or her side while having a seizure and keep his or her mouth clear to avoid choking.  Do not put anything in your child's mouth during a seizure.
• If your child has a history of falling during seizures, use a bath or shower seat during bathing and always supervise your child when near water.
• All caregivers should take CPR and First Aid courses annually, especially if a child in your home has a seizure disorder.

Symptoms of a seizure vary for each child, but the following is a list of symtoms.  If your child experiences any of the following, move any hard or sharp surfaces away from the child, place a pillow under the child's head if necessary and consult your child's physician or emergency services immediately.

Common Seizure Symptoms: 

• Generalized convulsions followed by sleepiness and confusion
• Repetitve movements such as chewing, clapping or lip smacking followed by confusion
• Localized convulsions in certain regions of the body followed by strange behavior and no memory of the event

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Isn't this a beautiful family?  They are like so many other parents looking to give their children the best in life.  On Thanksgiving, the Lofgren parents from Denver, Colorado brought their 10-year-old son and 8-year-old daughter to a beautiful, newly built, luxury home they had rented for the holiday in Aspen.  They ate their Thanksgiving meal and went to sleep that night expecting their good friends to join them the following day.

Unfortunately, they never saw those friends who were coming to meet them because they never woke up.  There was a carbon monoxide leak in a pipe in this new home and all four of the family members passed away in their sleep. They were killed by what is known as "the silent killer" or carbon monoxide. It sounds quite cliche to say this, but through their sad story, their deaths will help save lives.  Look at that picture of this wonderful family and let it remind you how important this message is.

During the winter months, hundereds of people in the United States die from carbon monoxide poisoning while thousands more seek treatment for symptoms associated with the gas.  Carbon monoxide can leak from furnaces, stoves, water heaters and cars and because the gas has no odor, victims often do not know they are being poisoned until it is too late.

Here are some carbon monoxide safety tips to keep your family safe from this very common hazard.  Please pass along this post to all of your friends and family to keep them safe.  

1. Purchase, utilize and frequently test your carbon monoxide detector.  There are three different kinds of detectors: plug in, battery operated and one that is wired to your home alarm system, which is the preferred mode.
2. Bring a plug in or battery operated carbon monoxide detector with you when you travel, especially during winter months.
3. If muliple people in your home start to feel light headed, nauseous or otherwise ill, evacuate the home and call the fire department to inspect the house immediately.
4. Warm up cars outside, never in the garage especially if it is attached to the home.
5. Never burn charcoal inside the home for grilling or cooking.
6. Utilize electric generators and anything that produces exhaust outside of the home or garage.
7. Have a qualified technician inspect your home's heating and gas systems annually.  They will need to get a digital reading of the carbon monoxide levels around your stove, oven, furnace, water heater and any other gas burning appliances.
8. Pass this message along to all of your loved ones, right now.

The Lofgrens could have been saved if someone had forwarded this message on to them.  Pass it on.  And if you don't have a carbon monoxide detector on every level of your home, now is the time to get them!  And if you are traveling, purchase a portable detector and bring it with you!   

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Ok gang, we are back with the amazing Johanna Beyer for Part II of our interview on life transitions.  I am finding her to be fascinating and hope you are too!  Let's see what she has to say now about motherhood and life changes...  

 
Before a woman has children, she can never truly understand how drastically life changes with the responsibilities of raising a family.  What are the most common challenges moms face when it comes to life transitions?

It comes as no surprise when I say that moms have to not only create new opportunities for themselves, but they need to figure out if those opportunities will support them in still making motherhood a priority. There is not a lot of time in the schedule and most often moms want to create a purposeful new direction that has flexibility to accommodate the kid’s schedules and needs. This can be challenging but totally possible. There is also a lot of guilt when it comes to mothers taking the time to identify what it is they truly want. Mothers are givers and nurturers. My job is to reassure moms that they can be proactive, entrepreneurial and still be giving and there for their family.

What are some of the best things we can do when we feel stuck or confused?

I think that the first thing you need to do is realize that feeling confused, frustrated or upset is TOTALLY NORMAL. When the wisdom voice inside of you starts to speak about changes it would like to make, the ego gets in the way and says, “Not so fast”. That is called fear and resistance, and it is a necessary part of the change process. The trick is to realize that while resistance is normal, it should not be the roadblock that leaves you paralyzed. Some practical things to do when you are feeling stuck is to listen and stay open. Keep a journal and track the messages and inner voices you hear. Do not panic that you have to change your entire life to be happy. There are so many tiny things you can do that point you in the direction of your life dream. Remember the more you resist, the more that stuck feeling will persist.

Can you describe a success story of a mom you coached?

When I first met Kim she was full of energy, had an amazing sense of humor and also was extremely hard on herself. She felt like she was a terrible mom, always getting mad at her kids and feeling lots of guilt around the fact that she no longer pulled in a paycheck. Kim was a self made woman, climbing the corporate ladder in the entertainment industry all on her own until she had reached the Senior VP of Public Relations for Paramount Studios. She was very well respected, made big decisions all day and managed a happy team of people. After the birth of her first daughter, Kim decided to stay at home and while she loved being a mom, she missed the excitement and challenge that came from her career. After daughter #2 came into the world she knew that the crazy world of PR was not worth going back to but she needed something new to direct all her ambitious energy towards.

Early in our work together it became clear that Kim was a natural athlete and LOVED competition. She was a go getter and thrived on setting goals and accomplishing them. She also had a passion to help obese children learn better eating and exercising habits. Kim needed to add some of that competitive spirit back into her life while still allowing time to be with her daughters. We set some big goals…get certified in Spinning, complete a triathlon and spread the word to local schools about her interest in working with kids. She accomplished all three and as a result she no longer feels like her spirit is being held back. She knew that she could not go back to her old career, but she did realize that there were many new ways to redirect her ambitious, competitive energy into purposeful endeavors.

Why do you love what you do?

I LOVE what I do because I am amazed by the human spirit. Each and every one of us has the power to listen to our inner truth and take actions each day to honor that. When people feel lost and unfulfilled I can see their special unique beauty and once they get back in touch with that inner beauty anything is possible. I have seen people make lots of positive changes in their lives and as a result help others to be on their path. Each time someone lets me into their life, I feel honored. Each time I am challenged in my own life I get inspiration from the people I work with. I feel so lucky to be doing my purpose work!

What is your availability like for new clients right now?  How can people contact you to set up an appointment?

If you need some extra support and guidance in your life right now we can work together. I like to work with people for a minimum of 6, one hour sessions. I work with people in person and on the phone.
I am at Stillpoint Wellness on Union Street in San Francisco every Monday and see clients Tuesday thru Friday in Mill Valley. If you are not able to meet face to face, I conduct the same sessions over the phone.
Please call me at 415-686-9592 to set up an introduction phone call or you can e-mail me at This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it . To learn more about me and my coaching process you can log onto www.onyourpathconsulting.com .

On a personal note, I have known Johanna for a long time and I can tell you that she is a very comforting and positive person.  In one conversation with her, you will feel a calmness and inspiration that will carry you through your day.  I highly recommend her services and encourage you to give her a ring to see if her services are right for you.

Thanks so much for bringing your talents to our readers here on Responsible Family, Johanna!  Stay tuned for more conversations with Johanna in the coming months.  We are lucky to have people like this to safely guide us through moments of uncertainty.  I encourage anyone who has life challenges or questions to contact Johanna.  She works over the phone (for moms, this is PERFECT for our busy lifestyles) so she can work with you no matter where you live!  Call Johanna today and give yourself the gift of clarity!  415.686.9592.

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